Much has been written about networking or making contacts. I often hear folks complain about less than desirable results. “I have loads of contacts, but they don’t seem to lead anywhere.” “I’m always networking, but I’m not getting to the right people.”
Yes, contacts are important in a job search. They’re important in career management as a whole. But you can’t base your entire strategy on them. People aren’t going to hire you just because you know them or engineered an interview with them. What often happens? People try to substitute networking for competence. Networking becomes labeled a nuisance, and people overusing it as pests. Networking loses its power. People who become contacts now wonder about motivation behind the reach-out.
A lion’s share of personal referral networking trickiness stems from misunderstanding what a contact can and cannot do for you.
All contacts are not created equal. Let’s look at four types of contacts and the ways to use (and not use) them.
1. Friends and Relatives
These folks often love you. They at least know you and want to help. And they, like everyone have potential to know people who can help you. This group might be connected to the banker, the politician, the technology manager, the non-profit director, even the Hollywood big-shot.
What they can do: (a) Give you names of people who work in an organization that interests you; (b) Mention your personable characteristics in a favorable light to others.
What they can’t do: (a) Be a reference, because they don’t know your work; (b) Lead you to a wide field of targets, because their reach / contacts may not be that broad.
2. People You Know Socially
These are the folks you meet when you’re out having a good time. You may seek them out as contacts, or it just happens. Although valuable contacts are made this way, don’t assume anything one way or the other. That guy you met at the party might be gold. But there are people who just don’t mingle where your networking opportunities are. Recognize potential and situations. Take it for what it is. Don’t try too hard.
What they can do: (a) Share names of others to talk with; (b) Refer you as someone worth talking to; (c) Give you on rare occasions, an on-the-spot informational interview.
What they can’t do: (a) Talk about the quality of your work; (b) Do what they say they will do (translation: namedropping and exaggeration are not uncommon).
3. References and Colleagues
These are folks with whom you have worked for or with in the past. Focus on those you felt most comfortable with; or who made it clear they liked your work. If it’s been awhile since your work relationship with them, try giving him/her a summary (in writing and in person) of what you’ve been doing, your success stories and your current work goals.
What they can do: (a) Spot possible new employers for you, especially if you are staying in the same field of work; (b) Say nice things about your work, skills and character; (c) Refer you to people in our outside their field—sometimes to decision-makers and power-holders.
What they can’t do: With some references, the sky might be the limit; but be thoughtful. Don’t overuse or abuse references. Treat them like gold and focus on the jobs you want most. On the other hand, colleagues—and not atypically bosses—can’t open the door for everyone you wish to access. Have a Plan B ready on generating leads elsewhere.
4. The Others
These are folks with whom you have conversed about their work. You introduced yourself online or the old fashioned way. You may have been referred by another contact. “The others” are strangers you’ve met. They often present great opportunities for informational interviewing or networking conversations and residual leads or follow-through. In fact, as my colleague and networking expert Jason Alba recently pointed out, “You rarely land opportunities through your first and second degree contacts; it’s through your fourth, fifth and sixth degree contacts.” The others.
What they can do: (a) Share information and perceptions about their fields and work world; (b) Refer you to others in their field (not necessarily key people).
What they can’t do: (a) Serve as your reference, because they don’t know your work; (b) Tell you where all the jobs in their field are. They may know of a particular possibility or two, but they will not know about all openings or potential opportunities.
My Point?
Networking works beautifully but not perfectly. And it works best when it’s part of your daily routine, not some reactive mode of “make things happen quickly”. There’s a reason for the adage, “fools rush in”. The key is credibility. If I don’t know you well, or you don’t pause long enough to tell me a bit of your story, or you ask more of me than is appropriate, I may still give you a referral. With very little trust or interest. I’ll probably give you nothing at all. Pass.
Don’t expect or demand too much from any individual. A contact is a courtesy extended. There are often boundaries. Gratefully acknowledge what referrals or leads you get, give back whenever you can, and smartly move on.
